keep hope alive

Our other children…. For the love of Pete

~ gracelessnessover40 ~ 4 Comments

petey

Often times we as humans decide to adopt a pet.

Dogs, cats, pigs, lizards, ferrets – the list can go on!

Animal companionship is shown to lower blood pressure and even prolong life.

I have seen firsthand how pet therapy affects those with Alzheimer’s and dementia, as well as with those with special needs and other medical challenges. They do wonders for the regular folks too.

About 14 years ago my good friend adopted this amazingly sweet pup on the fourth of July.

His name was Pete and we called him Pete the Sweet.

His chances of a long life were not great as he had a host of medical problems and kennel cough. However, Pete beat all of the odds and became the big brother of the family as they went on to adopt or acquire 5 other dogs.

But Petey was first.

His smiling face, soft, fuzzy body and the “harf harf” bark became the back drop for a visit.

As he aged he had problems with his hips, his vision and his hearing.

His mama loved him so much she would let him out and then if she wasn’t outside with him, would go bring him back up the stairs when he completed his business and his tour of the yard.

They talked about putting a ramp onto the porch so he could go in and out as he pleased.

Yes Pete was well loved.

I talk of him in the past tense as he finally crossed that Rainbow Bridge.

Our hearts are sad and the tears keep flowing.

The support on my friend’s Facebook page is overwhelming.

So many people loved that dog and she is a fabulous person.

I even changed my profile photo to one of the boy and Pete about 2 years ago.

To say that Pete was a family member is an understatement.

In the beginning it was Pete, then his brother Walter joined him.

Bootsy, Walter’s sister lived across the street, however she kept visiting and eventually ended up staying too.

Then Chunky and Pepper joined the party.

Supposedly there would be no more dog in their house. I mean 5 is a lot!

All well cared for house dogs and the mommy is OCD so clean was going to happen no matter what!

A few months ago, Pete got another sister in the form of Bella Bunny.

He was thrilled as he seemed to love most dogs and a few cats.

He was always barking. If someone moved, he barked to let them know to set down as he wanted to make sure all of his humans were together.

We have all said on many occasions, “Pete stop barking!”

I wish we could tell him that again.

They were fortunate the vet came to their home to deliver the “shot” to finally give him the peace he truly needed.

Everyone was home with him when he crossed over.

I have noticed more and more how people choose to do this over taking their pet somewhere.

It is so sweet to have them at home, surrounded by loved ones and familiar things, when they finally leave the planet.

Although it is hard, we know he is better off with no more pain and able to run again and bark at whatever he wants!

Selfishly I wish I could have had one more cuddle, one more lick from my buddy, but I am thankful I was just with him only a few weeks ago.

After talking with my friend I knew it was a matter of time.

It still doesn’t make it any easier.

I know when I walk into her house I will greet all the babies as I always do.

I also know the water works will start because they got Pete shortly after they moved into that house and he was one of the first to shove his way to you so he could get first loves.

It won’t be the same.

When someone we love dies we mourn that person and it takes us a while to get through it.

You never get over it but getting through it take times.

It is no different with animals who have become a part of our household.

For Pete, his humans were his mom, dad and big brother.

That was the “immediate” family.

Of course there is a host of grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends who are also grieving the loss of our beloved Petey.

So for all you animal lovers out there, give a hug or scratch to you babies.

You never know when it will be the last time you get to love them up.

Please do so often and with joy.

I know the tears will fall onto my pillow and I will wake up tomorrow and think I will get to see him in a few days.

Then I will remember that he has now gone on and crossed that Rainbow Bridge.

I like to think he is playing with his doggy cousins and pain free.

To my friend and her family, my heart cries with you and I know this pain.

I wish I could take it away, but I know it is part of the process of grief and you would never have it any other way.

Until we meet again, have fun chasing your friends and barking yourself horse!

I love you Sweet Pete with the Fuzzy Feet.

P.S. I urge anyone who is thinking about to adopt a dog or cat from your local shelter!

 

Manic Monday

~ gracelessnessover40 ~ 8 Comments

In case you didn’t know it, it is Monday again!

Yes, the least favored day of the week for some, and for others the start of something new and exciting.

I personally have the lines of “Manic Monday” going through my head.

Only parts because even though I have a scary good memory, it seems not all songs made the cut in whatever area of my brain in charge of that so I get just loops of parts of a song. Very irritating I can assure you.

For example, “it’s just another manic Monday… oh oh. I wish it was Sunday… oh oh, cause that my fun day. My I don’t have to run day… oh. Oh. Just another manic Monday.” Yeah maybe a line or two more and that is IT for the song. And it loops. Over and over again.

I have read and been told in order to have a good day you have to visualize your day the previous day and it will be good. That works out as well as my poker game, about 50/50 that I do it often because well I have to keep hope alive.

Somehow I feel like I lost part of my weekend somewhere and I should get a few, say 12, more hours tacked on to my weekend.

I am not selfish I would share that extra 12 hours with everyone!

I don’t mean I would want to be with others per se, but I will share the extra hours with anyone who needs them.

The rest of you may place yourselves on pause.

I would take that time and spend half the time with the boy and the other half with blissful, good sleep!

Maybe 15 more hour instead of 12 so I can have 3 more hours to clean up around the house!

Heck why don’t we just add another 9 hours and call it an extra day!

Then I could spend more time with the boy, sleep, clean and write!

Yes a whole other day!

There has got to be a way to get one of those!

Can you imagine?

“Yes I need an extra 24 hours please. No, no emergency I just need an extra day I am not ready for Monday yet!”

But even as I write Monday approaches.

Closer and closer to the midnight hour.

And then it happens.

Monday is here and there is nothing anyone can do about it.

Alarm not set and you’re late? Blame it on Monday.

Traffic got you running behind? Blame it on Monday.

Poor Monday.

It gets such a bad reputation just because it is the start of the week!

Everyone loves Fridays but Mondays? Not a lot of the Monday love so it seems.

Even when I try to “visualize” and make myself thing happy thoughts about the upcoming week, I can’t help but think “Oh Monday. We meet again. How will you play this one? Can we have a good Monday please?”

Because I sure could use one of those!

If it has to be Monday then it needs to be fabulous.

Only I have the power to make it so.

No matter what happens, I have to work to make it happen.

I feel it’s worth it.

So here’s to you.

Let’s make this Monday worth it!

Have a fabulously graceless Monday my friends!

Happiness, History and Hope

~ gracelessnessover40 ~ 11 Comments

This has been one of those wild, non-stop, emotionally charged, deliriously happy, historic, filled with hope exhausting days!

Technically it is now Saturday but since I haven’t been to sleep yet it’s still Friday night for me ha!

My morning started off a bit crazier than I would prefer, but I felt it in my soul it would be awesome. It was Friday, I was happy, the boy and I had/have plans for our weekend so all is good.

Then I am shopping for a few items in the local store and am inquiring about a movie I am looking to purchase for the boy (James and the Giant Peach – a classic). The young man helping me is 20 and we are discussing old school toys which are still awesome and he was impressed I shared with my son those toys, movies and I was just being me when I get The Text “SCOTUS rules marriage bans unconstitutional, marriage equality for all!

I literally shouted, “WhooooWhoo” out loud and started getting happy tears and dancing….then remembered I was talking to this really nice dude and so I tell him why, being kind of gentle with my words because I don’t want a confrontation, though you can tell he was open minded and whatever I had learned, it just made me happy. He looks at me a minute and tells me, “You are so cool I wish you were my mom…I hope that doesn’t sound creepy!” I just hugged him!

First of all let me say what this means to me.

My child will be able to grow up in a world I did not have.

Equality. For Real.

When I was a child it was a “sin” for couples of different races to marry. I never understood this and always went to my daddy with these kinds of questions. I understood he didn’t always agree with people, but he was one of the most honest, compassionate, genuine and fair people I have ever known. He cared for everyone involved in a situation.

This was a subject he and I had discussed several times together.

Coming from the deep south where it’s a “sin” just to be different, I valued his opinion and he was very respected both in his personal and his business life.

I was always questioning things, rooting for the underdog and generally trying to figure out why people couldn’t accept others for who they were.

He told me the fight for gays and marriage equality was very much like the civil rights movement in the 60’s and 70’s.

He would know. He stood up for what was right and believed in those who could make a difference and do a good job no matter the color of their skin. He fought to make the industry in which he worked here in Alabama equal across the board. Black, white, male, female. We were all equal in his eyes.

Though he did not agree with the gay lifestyle per se, he did understand their need to be equal and as human beings they deserved the same “luxuries” we are all given.

He had strong Christian values and told me “He wasn’t God and it wasn’t his place to judge.”

This is why I love and miss my daddy every day.

I think he would be proud that I am standing up for what I believe in.

That I choose to teach my son ALL Human Beings are Equal finally in the eyes of the law.

I have always taught him, and continue to do so, that everyone of us are HUMAN. We are all the same creatures who have different faces and personalities. You may not like everyone, you may not agree with everyone, but you need to respect everyone from a human standpoint.

We haven’t gotten into some people you just have to step away from yet!

I KNOW there is still a long road ahead.

I know there are battles to be fought.

I know, and it saddens me, that some people will resort to violence and hatred to get their point across. Needlessly.

However I Never thought I would see this ruling, this historic moment in history!

Happiness fills my soul for so many friends and a long battle finally coming to an end allowing anyone to marry the one they truly love.

It gives me hope to think of our future of more tolerance.

That my son will hopefully know less hate and have more compassion for others.

He doesn’t see “color” unless he’s referring to “my skin is white or golden when I get sun. Mommy’s skin is light brown but when she gets sun she gets browner but not as brown as my friend Nicolas at school he is brown brown.” It is only a description of his friends and people. I will teach him no different because it is beautiful and real the way he sees the world now.

Yes happiness, history and hope.

Love wins.

It does my soul good to feel all three in a single day!

Have a fabulously graceless Saturday!

I will be enjoying ribs and home cooking with friends this evening! All in happiness!

 

 

Just going to plant some flowers….

~ gracelessnessover40 ~ 17 Comments

Recently a friend posted on her Face Book page she had some daylilies and if anyone wanted them to come on by and get some.

I talked to my mom and asked because I though the front yard could use a little color in the garden and she whole heartedly agreed.

Of course I would go get them, dig them up and replant them.

That sounds So SIMPLE!

The reality is I went and dug up the plants 2 days ago.

I didn’t think I dug too many up and had put them in 2 bags, one for mom and I and another from another set of friends.

I was sore in places I forgot I had muscles! I was feeling all “nature girl” or something.

I gave my friends theirs on Sunday afternoon on the way to family dinner and had put ours in the yard. I knew they’d be fine for a day or two.

Monday was not a good day. No flower planting.

Tuesday, today, I woke up thinking “I got this.”

I tend to be delusional at times and this is so one of those times!

I go out into the yard where I originally thought I would plant them. Realizing they may not get enough sunlight at all, I changed locations to the front flower bed where there was a gap and a fabulous spot for my flowers!

So I start digging. And digging. And cutting away the cloth laid down years ago to control the weed population. I got 4 good holes dug. Then I went around and got the flowers.

After looking at the plants I realized there were way more than I thought and were clustered together. I needed more holes!

So I cut the fabric and started to get my shovel for more holes when I feel a piercing pain in my foot. I won’t lie. I hollered out a word not fit for small children to hear!

I thought I had been stung or somehow had gotten a sharp rock in my shoe. Nope, the “tacks” they use for the “weed cloth” was in my foot and a lovely shade of crimson was now showing on my foot!

Mentally I did the math and I am good on the tetanus shot (less than 5 years), however it Hurts!

So now I am hobbling in the house to “treat my wound” and feel sorry for myself! Only 5 minute pity party allotted today though!

But this is Life so I have to Suck It Up!

I am taking a small break and thought I would check emails, my posts, etc and see what’s happening in general in the virtual world and realized I could do a post about this.

In life, you plan to just “plant some flowers”, use that for whatever you need to do (organize, clean, plan a party, whatever), but somehow the time constraints and plans you put into place don’t always work out the way you want them to.

Heck Life sometimes just won’t Allow it to happen no matter what you do!

But remember you have a choice in Many things.

You have a choice in how you handle your situations.

For me, I am going to hobble back out there, get my holes dug and plant those flowers!

Hoping of course they live, this is my life after all, I am looking forward to seeing those beauties for years to come.

Because no matter how hard it turned out or how long it takes me, those flowers are worth it!

As are a lot of things in life we don’t want to take the time to do because it becomes more difficult than we expected. Those things are most likely worth it. We don’t need anymore regrets so don’t give up easily!

Always remember to keep hope alive!

Have a fabulously graceless Tuesday my friends!

My gracelessness is already shining bright today!