Remember to breathe and never give up… someone’s always willing to help their fellow humans


never give up what you love to do

Trying to remember to stop and just breathe can be a challenge. Believing all things happen for a reason can be hard at times. So can Keep Hope Alive, but I will never give up. Life is too short. You never know that it could be the last time you will talk to someone, hear their voice or hug their neck. Life happens.

We are told” this is the way it is” and “God has a plan” and “it’s life”. All true but it still doesn’t make it any easier.

Not being able to handle things the way you want them to be or having a curve ball thrown your way just when you thought the game was done can cause chaos in the soul. How you react and handle yourself speaks volumes of the person you are deep inside.

be perfectly human

You may see yourself as being able to hand you anything, but believe me, there are things in this world that can take you to your knees. It can knock the “I can handle anything” right out of your vocabulary because newsflash… WE ARE ALL HUMAN. WE HAVE FLAWS. WE ARE NOT INVINCIBLE. No matter how hard we strive and wish to be.

What I can handle someone else may be unable to and what someone else can handle I may can only deal with some of it or I have a complete come apart on my hands. It isn’t a case of someone being better than someone else, it means we are all human and each and every experience is different for each and every one of us.

I’ve have quite a few different jobs in my life and my hands down favorite is taking care of others.

charlie b being ther for someone

Whether it’s helping out around the house, driving and running errands, being with someone who has memory issues or taking care of someone who is terminal and handling the ugly ins and outs of that, I love to take care of others.

I am not the only one of my kind. However, there are levels to what I can and can’t do. Just like many others in my field, there are some that can help give someone a shower and some that can’t. I happen to be one that can. It becomes very personal when you are helping someone do something very basic that most of us take for granted. Most people never even think about it as it isn’t exactly everyday conversation for them. I completely understand and get that.

That is why I do what I do. I’m not in it for the money, but people think that because I have “office manager” in my title and I do marketing I’m making the “big bucks”. So far from the reality but I love finding the fit between clients and caregiver. It can be challenging but I love helping people make the human connection. I believe in where I work and promote it, as in marketing. I also fill in on cases, hard ones, when people call out and I need to be making sure everyone is being cared for but I know this person NEEDS our help and I can do it so I do.

This weekend I have been on call. My phone didn’t ring at all after 4:30 PM Friday afternoon. It started ringing Saturday morning at 9:12 and hasn’t stopped. I will be making sure folks are taken care of today. It’s what I do. Sometimes it gets overwhelming. I feel on the edge of panic. What if someone is left alone that I’m responsible for? I really don’t have control of other people and I can only count on maybe 1/3 of those people to be truly “available” when they say they will be. Heck just getting them to answer their phones can be challenging some days!

caring is being htere whenu want to be somewhere lese

My boss and I joked that when I’m on call things always happened. Multiple calls (right after we put an ad in the papers for help – who calls on a Saturday at 7 in the freaking morning or at 9 at night for a job?!), people calling out, clients needing care, caregivers having to leave due to sickness/family emergency in mid-shift, clients going to hospital – yeah it’s going to happen on my watch!   

So I am going forth this day with a prayer for hope, peace and calm. I hope I handle this day with a boatload of fabulousness and maybe even a bit of grace for this graceless chick.

hope keeps you going

As always, my motto is KEEP HOPE ALIVE!!!

*Also, I have 42 WordPress followers, 42 is the answer to everything in the universe per The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy which means Life is Fabulous Things are Happen’ Train!*

 42

I woke up alive and realized I needed to live the moments


I rolled out of bed groaning and stumbled to the bathroom to start the getting ready process. Shortly after, I cheerily woke up the boy from his angelic looking sleep and watched him stumble his way to the bathroom and then get himself dressed.

I was putting on the last of my war paint when the text came through that one of our good caregivers was out sick and I needed to fill the shift. I doubled my speed for getting out of the house, changed into scrubs and we left for the day.

My clients were way across town, out in the country. I somewhat know their routine and knew they would be getting hungry and breakfast is part of their routine.

I arrived only a few minutes later than their normal caregiver, “T”, but they remembered me and were happy to have someone there to “assist” them for the day. Mr. K met me at the door with a smile and Miss P was still in the bed. One glance around told me that they had been pretty much alone all weekend, as “T” and I worked together to help make them a schedule and keep things consistent for them. We have a system for them to follow and have shared it with their children. Their family is involved in their care but they have lives and families to raise too, so we are there to help mom and dad.

It isn’t that mom and dad, or P & K, are all that up in years, they are both 70 with her just having a birthday. Their bodies are healthy for the most part and they love to talk, laugh and enjoy life. They no longer go as much as they use to because they are both in different stages of Alzheimer’s and dementia. They are like thousands of others in the Boomer generation that are still “young at heart” and in need of care due to a terminal diagnosis.

Miss P has middle stage Alzheimer’s and needs help bathing, getting dressed and can no longer cook or clean. She talks some, more in the afternoons, but she is so sweet and a joy to be around. She has no problem with me bathing her and “helping” her get pretty for her husband. As long as she knows where he is, and I gently remind her if she gets anxious, she is fine.

Mr. K has early stage dementia. He “runs” the household and “helps” Miss P. She is his world and he talks of “his beautiful pearl” and “young blushing bride” as though it is now. You can see the love they share. He knows her memory is “bad” and that she needs help. He knows he “forgets” things but he has reminders and that is why I am there to help them.

We do our best to communicate anything that goes on to each other so that their weekdays flow consistently, or at least a semblance of it.

To watch her struggle to remember how to remove her clothes and thank me over and over again for being so “nice” to “help” her get bathed and dressed for the day, it breaks my heart. I think back to earlier that morning, was it really just that morning? When I got the text I would be covering for T and my day with them.

To see people so vulnerable in so many ways because by nature they are kind and trusting, but now we add in the memory loss factor and I worry for them. My problems and irritations seem to shrink in light of what they face on a daily basis. Not that I don’t have my own issues and hardships, but that I can get so irritated over something so small at times, or that I got so caught up in something I missed something beautiful. It makes me rethink what I see as important.

I think of how my mind works and how I ponder which thing was more important and then I will jump to another topic. I also will multitask and continue on with the flow of my day. I just know what needs to be done and I do it. I may miss things, but I know it’s on the list for tomorrow even if there is no actual written list. Then I stop. Their lives are no longer like that. They can’t remember things as clearly or even at all in some instances.

That afternoon I drove straight from their home through craptastic traffic to get the boy. I knew we had things to do, I still had to work and there were chores to finish, but I scooped him up and hugged and kissed him immediately. I savored the little boy sweat smell and the way he holds me so tight. I want those memories to always be there. I don’t ever want to lose that part of me. If I forget everything else, I want to remember he chose me to be his mommy.

I woke up alive but after going through the day I realized how alive I needed to be and I am thankful that I was reminded just when I needed it.

Keep Hope Alive and have a fabulous day!