Judge not lest ye be judged…or no one is perfect!


Lately I have noticed more judgement being passed on others. Not opinions but judgement.

In the Christian faith, and I will paraphrase, there is a verse, “Judge not lest ye be judged.” I am seeing is that there are many Christians that are doing the judging. Though to be honest, I am seeing a lot many people of all backgrounds who judge. I don’t understand that. For real, it does not compute with me.

I do not know anyone who is perfect. Seriously. Being perfect is being without flaw.

I don’t know one person who is truly without any flaws. One of the main problems I have with this is, again, who is someone else to judge others?

I understand laws, not that I agree with all of them, but I understand, respect and follow them. Of course I would never walk my cow down the middle of main street after 6 PM! There are some out of date laws on the books, but I will follow the law. That would be an entertaining one to break though, not that I am planning nor condoning the breaking of laws but that one makes me laugh!

What I have issue with are judgements because of disagreements. Disagreement on lifestyle, clothing, food, whom you should be with, when/if you should pray, maybe some think you shouldn’t pray so they judge because you do. Maybe your speech sounds funny or different so someone will judge you on that. Maybe they judge you on what I call the partials… they see a partial piece of your life so they therefore feel they know you and somehow that makes them master of judging you.

There is a fine line between judging and advising or suggesting.

Many times people don’t realize they are judging, they may feel as they are suggesting, but their tone and words sound so very harsh it is hard to think any other way. “You really should wear the other shirt that one makes you look fat.” To me that’s a judgement. And my girlfriends better tell me in a nicer way if something makes me look fat! Saying it like this sounds so much better. “You know that other shirt looks so much better on you. Why don’t you wear that one instead?” If I chose to wear said fat shirt, it is my choice and not for anyone to judge me.

That really is a lighter example of judging but hopefully it gets the point across! I have people that say I should get a bit more in depth with what I say and others say I say too much.

You can have opinions, strong one, just make sure not to blur the line of opinion and judgement. You don’t know what all is going on in the life of someone you so thoughtlessly pass judgment on. They may have lost a loved one, had a child melt down, lost their job so they aren’t in top form when running out the door. Their clothing choice is not for you to judge. The car they drive is not for you to judge.

You saw someone you know talking with “known criminals” so you assume and judge them. What if they were helping them, witnessing to them or sharing with them a better way to live their life? Yet you decided you “know” what’s going on so you judge. Then you tell others. Not only have you judged, but you have gossiped and most likely spread lies. How does that make you a better person?

I have seen people judged for their sex, their skin color, their political views and the church they do or do not attend. They are judged for their choice in friends.

Trying to raise a child in these conditions are challenging. It seems daily I am having to give my boy a different perspective and teach him how to not judge others. I admit I am not perfect. He now tells cars turning without signaling and going to slow to “Use your signal and own your turn!” Anyone who says kids don’t pay attention doesn’t pay attention to them! But he understands name calling, using the words fat, stupid and idiot regarding others will get him in time out faster than Superman can fly to the top of the tallest building.

So I ask you, do your best to not judge others. After all, when you point your finger at others to judge them, you have four fingers pointing back at you.

Have a fabulous day and Keep Hope Alive!

 

Be Yourself


Be yourself

How many times have you heard that said? Be Yourself.

We teach it and preach it to our kids and anyone else that will listen.

Be tolerant of others.

Show compassion.

Treat others as you want to be treated.

Yet more and more I see so many adults judging others going against what they “teach” their children and say in front of others.

They tell them to be kind, to share, to not bully.

Yet they do the exact thing they teach against if it goes against their “beliefs” or “way of thinking”.

This is something I think of quite often as the mother of a 4 almost 5 year old son.

I am blessed to have so many friends! I have friends of all ages and walks of life. I have friends from many different ethnic backgrounds, friends who practice different religions and friends who are gay, lesbian, Trans & bi.

Am I supposed to tell him that the ones who don’t look or act like the majority of people he is around are wrong or their life means less than his?

Am I expected to lie and tell him “it’s wrong” when I don’t see it as wrong but much of society does?

I am supposed to “hide” him from those who are different than he is by keeping him sheltered and home all of his young life, so that when he becomes a teenager or young adult he is appalled at the world and mad at me for not letting him know how life truly is?

Am I expected to tell him he can’t “be friends” with another human being because society doesn’t approve?

I Hope that’s not what’s expected of me because I WON’T DO IT.

I will not teach my son that any one person’s life matters over another. That someone is less than him because of their color, their beliefs, their gender or their personal preferences in whom they chose to love.

We hover over our children to protect them yet we do them more harm by tearing down another person for their beliefs and who they are as a human being.

When I tell him to be himself I want him to find who he is.

I don’t want to map his life out.

That isn’t my job as a parent.

My job is to love, nourish, protect, care, guide, teach and help him find out who he is and how to be the person he wants to be.

I know I am still in the some-what “easy” years before he reaches the age of understanding and sees for himself how the world really is, however I can still teach him compassion, caring, acceptance and how to value others.

Unfortunately the world will show him racism, hate, bullying along with a host of other things that scare the crap out of me.

If I do my job right, he will be able to navigate through that minefield and come out a better person.

I have never shared a link in a post before but I was researching some things and came across an article and video of how kids react to Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner. #HatchKids

 bhttps://www.yahoo.com/parenting/watch-how-these-kids-react-to-caitlyn-jenner-121190485333.html

 If we are really, really lucky maybe by the time my son grows up, maybe the hate, fear and misunderstandings won’t be as bad.

After all, I always say Keep Hope Alive!

Happy Wednesday My Fabulously Graceless Friends!