Sometimes I just want to scream.
I know that sometimes I feel that if I start I am unsure if I can stop.
It can be over nothing or something I have no control of, or the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back.
The scream starts in my core. I feel it traveling up my body and my mouth opens.
It falls out, faster, harder. It isn’t so much a scream as it is a roar.
Maybe it’s nothing related to anything else but it takes me hostage. I feel it inside eating me up and it needs release.
This guttural primal sound that comes from within racking my body like blows from a whip and twisting me up so tight I might explode.
The release of the scream is my salvation.
The verbal sounds of my system overload.
It is soothing, calming even.
That is how it plays out in my mind.
In reality, it is silent.
Sometimes I don’t want to be rational, civil or calm. Sometimes I want to let it play out in reality like it plays out in my head.
Danger or not, I wonder how it would be?
Be careful holding things inside.
When you hold it in too long and then let it out damage can be done.
Adulting is something I sometimes really don’t want to do.
Keep hope alive.