Stop the train, I think I want to get off….


That moment when you are at your wits end and you call your sister and say, “Go out to the pen, grab a chicken, a rooster, whatever you have most of and sacrifice that critter and chant for things to get gooder!” Yeah, I totally had one of those moments.

Times like that is where 80’s movies and song quotes come to mind. “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” Ferris Bueller. That’s the first one that popped in the old noggin’. Maybe being of the MTV and a Gen X’er play into that. Who knows?! And really, do I care? Eh, maybe not so much. I mean I can’t even place artist and songs together unless we go way back and even then I may know the entire song but not who sang it much less wrote it!

never know how strong u r until its only choice

By the way, the sacrifice thingy worked, at least for the one issue I had which involved an early start to my morning by at least an hour. And anyone who really knows me knows I am Not an early morning person unless I went to bed really early. I’m more of a night owl. Lately I am just a need more sleep-in-love-with-my-bed-and-think-about-it-far-too-often kind of owl. Human. Whatever!

This week has been a real hum-dinger! I am hoping and praying for a better today and a fabulous weekend. Life is what you make of it. Life may be tossing zingers at me, but I am truly working hard to handle it with class. Sometimes there just are no words. You have to just trust in what is there and believe in yourself. No matter how hard it gets, you know you can get through it. Maybe a little more worn than you had thought, but you make it through.

For me I learned when I had the boy that I can’t let those zingers drag me down for too long. I can wallow in it and I can ask why, but I also have to be present for him. I have to function for him and I want to. Gone are the days of me being able to stay in my pajamas for the weekend or when I come home from work. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Sometimes let go

The whole single parenting thing can be very daunting at times. Even if you co-parent well, it doesn’t make other things just easy. If you don’t co-parent well and you have other issues, it can be even worse. I am just blessed to be a parent at all. I am just thankful he is so open and understanding with me. He talks to me about anything and he’s only 5. He tells me he knows he can talk to me about whatever he needs and I won’t get too mad or upset.

I do screw up, pretty much weekly, but I know I am doing something right. I know that my greatest contribution to this world isn’t the words that I write but the human I teach to go out into the world. Love. Hope. Compassion. Understanding. Questioning. Patience. Faith. Trust. All of those things as well as teaching him how some other people hate, and sometime for no reason than that was how they were taught. Heady stuff.

The best part is that he makes life more bearable when things are rough. He loves me unconditionally. That and I now know my sister will do the bird sacrifice for me make all right in my world!

Happy Friday Eve! Keep Hope Alive!!!

thrs is friday eve

 

 

A little corner of my mind


Come with me and hold my hand.

Take me with you to the promise land.

Hold on tight don’t let me go.

For you see the things I do not know.

I don’t know want to walk alone.

I don’t know how to be all grown.

I wonder when I will learn these things.

They tell me to raise my voice and sing.

I guess I’ll smile and nod my head.

Pretend this feeling is not of dread.

I will hold my head high as the show must go on.

But in my soul I know the road is long.

On the horizon I see great things, I know I will get through this pain.

It won’t be just me in my thoughts and mind, I will have others to help me this time.

Ones I know will always be true, no matter what, through and through.

As I mature and learn through the strife, I have uncovered the joy and hope in my life.

So see if you have hope, a bit of faith and pray, you will make it through another day.

*I hope you enjoyed my poetry as I enjoy writing it. Sometimes it takes longer and other times it flies right out but I don’t always share it right away and sometimes I keep it for myself or the person it was written for. I have come to realize it’s very cathartic for me to share as I get more and more messages as to others feeling similarly as I do. It’s nice to know others can relate and even compliment my thoughts.

Have a fabulously fantastic Thursday!

Keep Hope Alive!

We can make it through… just never give up


chanel little engine that could

I think I can. I think I can. I think I can.

I know I can. I know I can. I know I can.

Every breath I take. Every move I make.

Is one step closer to achieving something I need to get done.

One step at a time.

dont give up

It may be a slow step, but it is a step none the less.

I can do it.

I believe in myself.

i believe in me

I know me.

I have faith.

i can write other see it too

I can make others believe it too.

Just a bit of faith and hope and pixie dust.

those who dont believe will never find it

Never give up.

Keep hope alive.

Do you believe in anything?


Do you believe in anything?

The definition of believe is “to have confidence in the truth, the existence, or reliability of something, although without absolute proof that one is right in doing so”.

Do you have hope?

The definition of hope is “the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best”.

In my mind, these words mingle together. If I believe in something or someone I have hope that the best outcome will happen.

The tricky part is some may feel that believing is stronger than hoping. I get that. I totally do.

For me though, having both belief and hope, is the best and strongest intermixing in my mind.

I love the two of them together for to me they seem to make it that much more real.

Neither words are “tangible” so to speak. But together they mean having faith, of putting all of yourself and you secret hopes and dreams all in the same basket and believing that it will all work out for the best possible outcome for my life. My motto “keep hope alive” is such a part of me as it gives me a renewed strength where I believe the best is still a reality.

Yes there can definitely be instances where you have hope, but you don’t believe or have faith in a situation so you hope for the best.

Or you believe in something or someone but know deep down that it won’t be as you had hoped it would be.

Faith is a bit different. The definitions “confidence or trust in a person or thing” and “belief that is not based on proof”.

All too often we toss out the terms “I believe you.” “I have hope.” I have faith in this situation when truly we don’t. I feel that it is something that for some is learned and even expected to be said. Or you say it so often you want it to be true, but again your gut tells you that it isn’t. And no one wants to suffer the heartache and depression of no longer having their faith, their belief and their hope pounded into the sand.

Which is why I always say Keep Hope Alive.

For me, I can never give up. I can never stop believing that better things, better people, better situation are out there for me and mine.

I have faith that I will find that happiness and peace I so desperately need.

I am seeing it now in my life.

I want to be cautious yet I feel this mystical pull telling me, yes, it is right and true. Run towards it and not away.

I have had my heart broken, my trust shattered, my faith questioned.

I have also picked myself up, dusted off and got back on the ride of life because I Believe in myself. I believe in others. I have hope and faith that not everyone is bitter and angry.

If the past few months have shown me anything, it has shown me to never lose faith. Never give up hope and never stop believing.

Because sometimes dreams and peace really do come. And I can’t spend my time discounting it because of past experiences. I have to believe in myself and have faith that walking down this path will not lead to heartache and destruction.

I know that I will lose friends and loved ones. This is life and it isn’t always pretty and it’s definitely not perfect. But when I find those special people that make me happy, give me butterflies, make me feel good inside about myself, I can’t not take a chance. Have a little faith. I can’t not keep hope alive.

For where would I be if I had no belief? No hope? No faith?

Sad and lonely and most likely in a deep, dark miasma of depression I am sure.

Not that I don’t visit the dark hallways of my mind. There are many and they are vast.

It makes me appreciate all of the beauty, joy and happiness I feel when something or someone I believe in proves me right and does not only for me and mine, but also themselves.

So try to have a little belief, hope and faith in your fellow humans. Try to see the world in a different perspective. Trust me, it can change your world!

Have a fabulous day!