Ahh the first Sunday after college football in Alabama! Both Alabama and Auburn kicked booty and of course it was a late night with friends and family.
Earlier this week my lovely boy, who learned “Roll Tide” before he could say complete sentences and was dressed all in Alabama attire when brought home from the hospital, yelled “War Eagle” while dressed in an Alabama t-shirt on the way to school. I whipped my head around and said, “What did you say?” Smiling he replied, “Warrrr Eagle Mommy!” I quickly found out he had learned it from his teacher at school. He was a bit concerned I would be mad. Apparently he is already caught onto the fact that the two teams are rivals and was wondering if he was “in trouble with me” for saying it. So was his teacher! I assured them both that although I was a Bama fan through and through, I was not a rabid fan and cheered for the other team as long as they weren’t playing each other.
I realized how fine a line it is. I have always known that people argue, fight and even divorce over the college rivalry here. It blows my mind.
To be born in Alabama means you are basically assigned a team at birth. Usually the team your parents are for.
Growing up I always cheered for Alabama because that’s who my daddy loved. My mom became a Bama fan after marriage, as several of her family members went to Auburn. Later my younger brother graduated from Alabama so her ties were strong by then. My boy has both and aunt and uncle who attended UA so it was a natural choice to dress him in crimson and white and teach him “Roll Tide” and “Go Bama” along with the fight song.
I have recently realized that may be a mistake. This does not mean I will stop buying him Bama gear and suit him up for Auburn per se.
While having the conversation the other day in the car I made a comment that “I don’t do orange it doesn’t look good on me.” He said, “Well I look good in red, white, blue and orange Mommy.” And he’s right.
As parents we tend to lead our children to what we like best. Not that it is a bad thing, but we don’t really stop to think of the implications it has on them.
Yes, I am moving a bit deeper than just football so bear with me.
The boy is like me in so many ways it scares the crap out of me. But he is Not me. Nor is he his father. He is his own being who is coming more and more into who he is as a person. Not just a mini-me. He certainly has learned many traits, most good a few probably not as good, from me and his dad, but he also has his own opinions about things.
Yesterday my mom took the boy and I to the local science center for the day. His birthday is coming up and she wanted to have a bit of time with just the three of us.
We had a blast exploring, learning and playing for hours. When we were leaving we had to pay to get out of the parking deck. Mom and I were frustrated because we couldn’t get the machine to take our money to get out and were a bit snappish with each other, but truly nothing ugly or rude. He pipes up from the backseat, “Hey all that jealousy and anger isn’t nice, and you both need to be good to each other.” Did I mention he’s almost 5? He hasn’t quite got all the basics down of emotions and what means what, but we got the idea. After talking to him and explaining what jealousy meant and how we both were just frustrated that we couldn’t get out of the parking garage, the pay to get out box wasn’t working so we had to move, he said, “Well y’all just need to talk nicer to each other then. People will think you’re mad at each other.” It’s a bit scary when the kid is smarter than the adults.
I’ve come to realize I have to let my boy make his own choices in life. I may not always like them, like letting his thick hair grow out because he wants to or doing things I do a certain way differently, but they are his ways. As long as it isn’t harmful to him or others I want to let him grown into who he want to be. Not someone I think he should be.
I hope you all have a fabulous day!